My name is Sandra, and I am a 57 year old mother of two, and Nanny Sannie to two beautiful granddaughters, age 4 and 6.
I was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer in October 2012. After a lumpectomy, chemotherapy and radiotherapy I was considered free from cancer, and with hormone therapy (tamoxifen) I was told I had an excellent chance of survival. And I went straight back to my old life.
After ten years clear, my diagnosis of stage 4 metastatic breast cancer with bone lesions to my sacrum and pelvis was a shock. Knowing what I know now, it shouldn’t have been a surprise, as I had spent more than two years suffering from work induced stress, high levels of anxiety, and panic attacks. It didn’t occur to me back then that my mental health condition was actually triggering a life-threatening physical reaction. However, as I believe that I myself caused my disease, I am equally convinced that it’s possible I may cure it, despite the poor statistics and prognosis.
It took over four months after my initial diagnosis before I finally saw an oncologist. Gone was the positive terminology! In 2012 I was told my tumour was very treatable, and that I had every chance of survival. This time I was told ‘terminal’, degenerative’, ‘palliative care only’, all delivered in tones of doom and gloom. The oncologist suggested that with targeted therapy I would ‘be able to live well for a long time, maybe two years.’ Two years! I was most indignant. ‘Two years is not a long time!’ I spluttered.
By then I had bought numerous self-help books and carried out a great deal of on-line research, joining a number of Facebook support groups. I wish I had known about Yes To Life back then! I knew I wanted to go down the route of alternative or complimentary therapies, but most of the groups I belonged to were US based, and I really struggled with feelings of isolation and simply not knowing where to look to get help. It seemed very difficult to find alternative cancer help in the UK! By the time I saw the oncologist and had a baseline scan, despite diet and lifestyle changes, my disease had progressed all the way up my spine and into my hips and sternum, and my weight was frighteningly low.
Initially I was very reluctant to take any conventional treatments at all. However, I stumbled across Care Oncology Clinic, which uses off label (re-purposed) medications to target fuel and signalling pathways and literally starve the cancer. My doctor there explained that the medications they would prescribe for me would work synergistically with the standard of care medication, and that there was a real chance that I would be able to eradicate the cancer completely! I had previously contacted a Traditional Chinese Medicine doctor, an Integrated Oncologist and an alternative healer, and nobody had suggested that they could do anything but support me during traditional treatment and alleviate side effects and symptoms, so this was the first time I felt any real hope.
At around the same time, I also started taking fenbendazole, an animal worming treatment that had been found to have powerful anti-cancer properties, and a whole raft of other supplementation and herbal remedies. I watched many inspirational video series about alternative cancer care and stories of those surviving end stage cancers against the odds. But inside I was still floundering, drowning in a sea of conflicting information, fear and doubt. I was in my own clinical trial of one, just doing the best I could with my own research, taking bits and pieces from different protocols, checking for interactions and contra-indications, referencing naturopathic guides and published studies, and also having to decide what was accessible and affordable. Radical Self Care is very expensive!
But one of my biggest breakthroughs came when I attended the Yes To Life conference, held at Friends House in Euston in September 2022.
I became aware of this event via a Facebook group, just one week before the conference was held, and booked tickets for myself and my husband almost on a whim. I almost didn’t go, because I was still suffering from anxiety and just the thought of the journey and experience felt quite daunting. I felt I would much rather just stay at home! I’m so glad I made the effort; I can honestly say that it was a life changing experience. For the first time I found myself in a room full of likeminded people, in similar circumstances. I was surrounded by and immersed in a cloud of optimism, hope and belief in the power of self-healing. Everything about the day was inspirational, motivating, magical. There were amazing presentations, underpinned by personal testimonies of miraculous healing. There were workshops delivering practical tools and techniques to assist in healing, backed up by solid, scientific evidence. I spoke with many other attendees, some still on their healing journey, others who had successfully restored their health. The food was healthy and delicious, the conference goodie bags an absolute delight, the trade stands marvellous, and the whole presentation of the day was professional, friendly, welcoming, inclusive. I loved every minute of it, and more importantly, I feel that I left transformed. From that day on, I knew I had a plan, I had positivity, and more importantly, I felt that the universe was taking me into its arms and showing me the way.
The Yes To Life conference led to my joining other support groups, attending other events, making more connections, and every step felt more life affirming and transformational. I wasn’t at all surprised when my November CT scan showed that disease progression had all but halted. This is a major step in itself, as stage 4 cancer has been compared to an out of control locomotive; it takes a whole lot of work and energy to first slow it, and then stop it, before it can even begin to be reversed. My next two scans were even more positive, showing not only that there was no disease progression, but that some bone lesions had disappeared completely, along with two nodules in one of my lungs. My oncologist considers me to be stable. I consider myself to be healing.
One thing I’ve learned is that stage 4 cancer is an evolving journey. My personal protocol has been subject to ongoing change. Diet and lifestyle adjustments are ongoing; there is still much inner healing work to be done. I am now changing direction again to look at a more naturopathic route, in the sure and certain knowledge that the medications will still be there for me if I do need to return to them. But one of the constants in my healing journey is the knowledge that healing comes from within. Today my life is transformed from before my diagnosis, and although I am not going to suggest that stage 4 cancer is a good thing – I would much rather not have it! – my quality of life is now so much better, and I’m happier and more fulfilled than I have been in decades. Cancer shows you what is important and what isn’t, and in some ways I think it may have actually saved my life.
You can book your ticket for this year conference on the 7th October in London here
